Valhalla Chronicles: The Snow White Complex


Snow White is all up in sista-gurl’s dome
Singing in that thin shrilly voice of hers
‘Bout whistling while she works – all happily dee – happily dum
Aided by her rabid forest animal crew
Hardliner lays down the law – she don’t want no vermin all up in her crib
The cute watercolour birdees she could just about stomach
But it is high time for Prince Charming to come –
Astride his gallant steed and whisk that nut case away to his Royal digs
To deflower her ass into the real world
Of hardcore matrimony and motherhood

Though that chick is so dayum psycho – she would only be
Too happy to become the man’s maid – cook – and freak
Forever after their happily after
Hardliner winces as Snow pulls a note – seemingly from high heaven
That could scare nappy hair straight
Lawd–have-mercy – where is Nina Simone’s “Blues for Mama”
To put a beat down on that bish

“What’s your beef with Snow White Boo”
The Irates ask with slight intrigue pricking a pinhole
In their impassive facade

Aside from that cray cray mess jacking up her dome
With a shrilly whistle and work routine
Snow White perpetuates the princess-hood fantasy
The epitome of perty – perfect and pristine
And whose world revolves around the dream of snagging
A handsome and chivalrous Prince – who rescues her from
Uh – well – a certain situation with a psycho hater
Who just happens to be her step mama
Hey – one can’t have it all in life
And anyway there aint hardly a woman out there who don’t gats
At least one hater who wants to put a beat down on her ass
For some reason – valid or not
So big deal – Snow gats beef with her old lady
And – what – the reward for her sufferance is marriage?
Hardliner’s irritability makes a jailbreak from
The zen fortress she has been trying to build
Oh – what the heyul – she gats issues

“Aint that truth” her Irates sarcastically counter

And sista gurl counts to ten whilst trying to keep a tight lid
Over the anger threatening to tear down her Zen Fortress

“Snow White Boo – really?
Why are you picking on this harmless gurl?

Whutt – yall gon send her crew of dwarfs after me?
And another thing – don’t it seem just a bit disturbing
That this chick is shacking up with seven men?
And dem little fellas don’t gats no impure thoughts
About sampling more than her sumptuous blueberry and apple pies?
Well – at least Dopey is trying to keep real
Hardliner is sure that his fantasies far exceed
Those Snowflake kisses on his forehead
Disney – is dead wrong for feeding little girls that mess

“Your daughter being one of them Boo – keep it moving”

Oh they are on a role today
But her fortress of peace and tranquility will not crumble
Even if she is using all of her reserves to keep
Her inner ratchet locked in the dungeon

“That is your problem – you are still Ego’s bitch”

Oooooooooooh – Gawd dayum – umph
Ms. Ratchet is pulling a nigga run for the Fortress gates

“And the lesson is Boo” – their unperturbed mien
Effortlessly bulldozes Hardliner’s Ego infused anger
“A quick temper makes you look stupid and inefficient
Not every little thing is worth raising hell for
If you want to live in a Zen like state – you must show pugnacity the door
There will be people who God will put in your way to jack you up
Just to test your spiritual mettle
Their reasons are really of no import
But what counts is how you react to those situations
And every time you fail because your anger gets the best of you
Surrender your hubris to humility
You will hold up your Zen Fortress better
Now – back to Snow and call a thing a thing
Your issue with this chick is that you see her in you
And Ms. Ego can’t reconcile with her presence because
She views Snow White as weak – cloying and naïve
The antithesis of a badass
But now Snow White has come out of exile and wants acknowledgment
What are you going to do mama?”

Hardliner is suddenly sweating – fidgeting nervously
And thinking about pulling a nigga run
Dang – her Irates are taking no prisoners today

“Every little girl dreams of being a princess
Especially those little girls whose daddies never
Told them they were special and beloved
Many a woman – no matter how damaged and bitter
They may be about men – harbor Snow White in their bosom
They covet the dream of being rescued by a valiant prince
Who is everything they want in a man – perfect and generous in his love
Their alpha and omega to complete and validate them
And for some Boo – to be the daddy they never had”

Umph – call a thing a thing
Yeh – Hardliner admits to hating on Princess Snow White
Cause she wallows in torment from her jealous and insecure step-mama
While singing almost reverently ‘bout her Prince – who gon turn up some day
Then only runs away when the bish tries to wax her off
To find refuge with Dopey and his crew
This chick is the ultimate victim –
With her fate resting in everybody’s hands but her own
Some day my Prince will come – choops
How’s about sanging from your gut Snow
Pull an Aretha – Ms. Franklin – loud and strong
That “Ima be my own dayum prince
And bust me the hell outta here
Cause I don’t need no man to complete me”

“Is that how you roll Boo – are you that badass?
Or could it really be that Snow’s longing to belong to someone
To fall subserviently at the feet of marriage also lies within you too
And could it be that this little truth is the main reason for you getting hitched
Unprepared for and ignorant of what lay ahead of you
And now – do you still feel your badass mojo or the sting of stupidity?

Lawd have mercy – she is having an out of body experience

“Roll with it mama – this break through aint gon be
Perty – perfect and pristine”
her Irates are not on a mercy vibe today
“Put on your grown ass woman panties Hardliner and deal real
Snow White is forcing you to look at the way you view marriage
Do you feel diminished by the role of wife and mother”

They have seemingly hit a raw nerve cause Hardliner’s back is up
Why they gats to bring her kid into this?
She feels naked and judged all of a sudden
Aint no one gon make her out as being regretful of
Sailing the seas of motherhood – though at times dem seas
Can rough her up real dread

“Admit it Boo – you need to feel that you are more than
Just someone’s mama – and far more than someone’s wife
Marriage threatens your identity
And so you have resisted coming into its fold”

Cause there is more to life than being someone’s wife
She is not about assuming any man’s identity
And his wifey perception of the sweet little woman
Cooking and cleaning for him like an enraptured Snow White
Uh –uh – Hardliner – queen of badass is not a house wife
And just because she gats to keep a clean house
Don’t mean she gats to whistle while she works
Hey – nuff respect to those divas who are stay at home moms
But June Cleaver aint for her

Yet Snow White is blowing up Hardliner’s dome with her shrill
Dayum gurl – keep a lid on it

“Until you take onus for inviting her into your space
She will remain there – forever after happily ever after”

Fine – Hardliner acknowledges that there is some part of her
That craves attention and validation from a man
The part of her that feels less of a woman if she fails to please
Her lion in any way
She is that good girl who was bred on the fairytales of princesses
Finding happily ever after with the ultimate Prince who completed them
Yeh – like most little girls she played here comes the bride
With princess dust clouding her vision
Then got bitch slapped into a coma by marriage upon the revelation
That it has never been friends or even acquaintances with Snow White

“Hardliner – there is nothing wrong with a woman
Wanting to please her husband
It does not make her weak or gullible
But since you are coming from a place where being open
To love and affection makes you feel vulnerable to heartbreak
Your views on marriage will be anything but positive
You don’t have to be hard all the time – life will pass you by Boo
And so what – some women believe that marriage completes them
That they are simply following the order of life –
Woman equaling nurturer and giver”

Until her goblet runneth empty
Hardliner pours on the cynicism – she can’t help herself
Trusting a man can get one badly bruised and beaten

“These are your daddy issues talking and your judgments about marriage
That you have carried into your union with your Lion
Mama – you got married with princess dust in your eyes
Now you are finding out that your princess gats substance
And she aint down with your Disney Snow White model
She is a real woman who is redefining marriage for herself
Cause she is only now finding herself
She is forcing you to face your childhood princess
And bid her safe journey to her happily ever after with her sweet Prince”

Sobriety feels good – she has been high on that
Disney princess dust for so long
But now she is now looking at marriage with new eyes
Knowing that it is ok to redefine it for herself
To step outside the bounds of a structure she could
Never really fit into anyway
Most importantly she realizes it is not her place
To judge those women who love being homemakers
Hey – to each his own
Hardliner has come to the understanding that Loving a man
And wanting to please him does not diminish her
Or illustrate her dependence on him
Love is love – and she is learning to stand in its light
Without her fairytale princess dust clouding her judgments
What’s more – she is learning that badass means acknowledging
Her fear of love shredding her like mincemeat
And yet still vow to love hard anyway

One thing Hardliner is not – and that is stupid
Sista gurl gon always keep her goblet full
And her tea gon be sweet too
Women – love hard – love pure – love faithful
But always give out your suga judiciously
And one more thing – don’t wait to be rescued by a man
Life your life full to the brim with joy
And when you find that man – yall gon rescue each other

“Not bad Boo” her Irates applaud

Yeh – a little somethin’ somethin’ I learned along the way

“Even if it took Snow White to school you” they jab

Ummmmph – she rolls her eyes
Thank God that crazy heffa is gone!


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