Valhalla Chronicles: Boning Crazy

Standard

If there is a thin line between love and hate
There is one thinner between love and cray cray
And Hardliner has sure-nuff crossed it
Sista gurl is boning crazy right now
Straddling and riding it like she be possessed
Leaving her nothing but a scary – adrenalin fueled high on insane anger
Ooooooooh – she is so wired – so ready to tap
Into the overwhelming compulsion to do some ugly-ass mess
Cause the sweetest woman in the world
Can be the meanest bitch in the world
If you make her that way

Her Irates are feverishly trying to dissipate
The supernatural crazy pulling the strings of Hardliner’s reasoning
Right now that chile could not hold on to sanity
Even if it came to her docile and handcuffed
And Hardliner is aware of her Irates –
Their ultra-calm trying to pacify her fury
With words of forgiveness, patience and love
Well their jive aint flying today
Sista gurl gon be doing some hardcore binging
Screwing sublime crazy until her body is racked
By furious – gut shattering orgasms

“To what purpose Boo”
Her Irates figure that the best course of action
Is to let her ride this thing out

Righteous indignation

“Baby girl you are beyond righteous indignation”

Hardliner sucks her teeth
As she travels back to the source of her ire –
And ooooooooh – she can feel an intense orgasm building
Threatening to take her mind a sphere or two beyond the Twilight Zone
Now – real bitch ass cray cray is staring her in the face
And sista gurl back-peddles – feverishly whispering prayers
To the Great I Am to yank her ass to simple Pisstossicity Ville
Where she can safely woo her righteous indignation

Her Irates comment on her little scare
“It takes a special breed of persons to kick it
In the spheres beyond the Twilight Zone Boo
And you don’t have the balls for it
Now breathe deeply
Accept your humanness
Accept that you are enraged
Forgive yourself for allowing your inner ratchet
To wreak havoc on your blood pressure
Your ulcer prone gut
Your nervous system
To render you completely senseless
And most off all – forgive yourself for disrespecting
Your spiritual mandate – which is by the way?”

Hardliner purses her lips
That flowing like Budda and rolling with the unseen
Aint gon jive today
Dem Irates / angels / spiritual consciousness
Think it is that easy to forget a burn and just walk away?
Hey – even Jesus got riled up over sacrilegious behavior
In God’s temple – enough to do some serious damage right there
Nevertheless she is grateful to her Irates for saving her ass

“Again“

Hey aint that what angels are for?

“Little girl why do you make things hard on yourself
You can’t keep a handle on your pisstossicity
Long enough to blink an eyelid
Your frequent vacations in Pisstossicity Ville will kill you
Anger – aggression and fear will poison your insides Boo
We are trying to save your life
Life is too beautiful to waste on righteous indignation”

Hardliner finds it hard to let go of all her crazy
Give all her anger away like it don’t mean jack shit

“Why would you want to hold on to anger Boo?
Do you equate the anger with your perceived hurt?”

Uh – perceived?
Heyul – why not go for alleged?

“Hardliner settle your feathers
You are like a pugnacious rooster
Flapping and crowing like you have something to prove”

Their tone is gentle – soothing as they try to
Lull the remaining crazy anger from her dome

Hardliner finds her righteous indignation seeping from her body
And there aint a dayum thing she can do about it
Dem Irates are using their supernatural mojo on her –
Glamouring her into existing in this space of peace –
Or more like it – a space in which she is more amenable
To good reasoning

“What has you so enraged that you would bone crazy Boo?”

Duh – marriage – what else?
There are moments scattered here and there
When things between she and her man are cool
But the remaining 85% of the time their shit is jacked up like GAZA
Hardliner feels like she walks in a shadow world
Where sunlight constantly eludes and taunts her
Marriage aint for the faint hearted – that in itself
Speaks for the high divorce rate worldwide
But man – GAZA should not be all up in her grill 24/7
The only emotion she feels at times is iron cold anger
At being tied to a situation with an emotional cripple

“Oh – and you are just open and loving as Snow White?
Every time you dig into your vault of wrongs and injuries
Your Lion has inflicted on you
Think of your own wonderful mess
If he isn’t giving you emotion to work with
Then you aren’t far off”

Yall aint right
She’s bleeding from her wounds here
And they gon pull the Snow White card on a sista

First off Hardliner – let go of your story
You are holding on to those wounds too possessively
Why do you covet toxicity?
Your anger – fear – emotional pain – hurts
Sweety – you play the role of the quintessential Victim
Belting out your swan song of righteous indignation

Dang – is it her or has that Valhalla wind really flipped its chill factor
Talk about icy death cold all of a sudden
Ah ha moments should leave her skin aglow and feeling sun-kissed
Not so freezer burnt that her melanin pulls a nigga run

Her Irates sigh
Hardliner takes her cue from their exasperation
Yeh – she is a drama queen
And she’ll concede to wining countless OSCARS for her Victim role
Playing the victim takes the light off of her dirt
And lays blame at the feet of the other party

Basically this is one of the ways in which
You put your house slave to work

Her Irates are on the real
Hardliner mumbles something about Valhalla aint meant for black folk
Her resistance still pounds its chest defiantly
Sista gurl don’t do the cute pout
And she aint gats the bone structure for a surly disposition
That Valhalla wind though chilly – gats a kind of spring freshness to it
It is so obvious that her Irates are flexing their voodoo mojo
Since she is willing to admit that all her bravado is pointless
Even willing to admit that she needs to get her shit together – like yesterday

For starters acknowledging that she often assumes the victim
When she reminds her lion of all his mistakes with her
When she sings her mama and daddy blues
When she does not want to admit that she is an emotional retard
And is afraid of letting him in all her sacred spaces
Yeh he is no Prince Charming
But sista gurl can be a little nicer
Her gripes with him are really her gripes with herself
And her inability to operate in a vulnerable space with her husband

Lawd Jesus

Aint nothing like that spring fresh – windswept fragrance
All up in newly cleaned laundery
Doesn’t that feel good baby girl
To be cleansed from the inside out
Lesson here Hardliner – quit playing the Victim
When you feel the urge to do so – acknowledge this
And choose to follow another path
Choice Boo – God’s gift to humanity
Anything and everything comes down to choice
Your choices – conscious or not – shape your world
It is your choice that you continue walk in shadow
Where your marriage is concerned
But every blessed day the Great I Am gives you a fresh opportunity
To make the choice to walk in the light of your truth
No matter how terrifying or painful
And Boo – try to maintain your grip on Ms. Ego
Righteous indignation gats her name all over it

Hardliner can’t argue with her Irates’ sermon
Her insecurities were triggered and crazy came a calling
This type of anger soothes for only a little while
She has left that sublime rage fueled world
And is somewhere between Pisstossicty Ville
And cold – dead anger – the worst kind

The cancer kind boo – fix it

If only it were so simple

It is simply the will and the word baby
When you go pass the hard rocks playing a rendition
Of Jimi Hendricks’ Psycho in pit of your stomach
Going further down – waaaaay down –
To hit your rock bottom of pain and despair
Only then will you choose to get your shit together
It seems you gats a high pain threshold boo
Or is it that fear is the Hamas of your Gaza

She catches her breath

Yeh – indigestion is a bitch – `n’ it?

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