Queen of Thrones Chronicles: Fake It Till you Make It

Standard

Hardliner may be that ride or die Star Wars chick
Heyul – she’ll ride hard for anything with a God
A magic orb – a dashing knight hero with a flaming sword
Enchanted beings – especially elves named Legolas
Umph – a sista could get real creative on dem pointed ears
And as girlfriend revels in her lustful reverie
One of Oya’s feisty gusts snatches her out of it

Leave the elf alone Boo
Her Irates advise – you were saying
Go’ head – we are intrigued

Hardliner rolls her eyes skywards
But says nothing despite the urge to offer
Her own unique brand of sweet and sour jocularity
Anyway – she was saying that despite her
Frequent escapades to fantasy / syfy worlds
Home gurl knows that she lives in Reality Ville
And that fact is not fiction
Like knowing that she aint gats two pennies to rub together
Until the next payday

But then some enlightened being gon try and run that
New age jive by her that she is actually financially challenged
Negro please
When your bank account has flatlined
Aint no other defining word that can do your situation
Justice than flat ass broke
Hard up
Skint
Did she say broke?
She don’t have to fake abundance until it is here
Either the bitch is in her life or it isn’t

Look at you – casting all your pearls to swine
But then again they should be
If this is all you have to offer

Her Irates do not waste any diplomacy on her
Chile what is your stress?

Well if yall gon put it that way
Hardliner doesn’t want this to come across as a woe is me rant

Oooooh – ignorance is indeed bliss
We thought it was – at least it
Looks and smells like one of your odes to woe
Prey tell – what is it Boo?

Hardliner is weighing various responses right about now
Either she pops awf something real ratchet
Or for once she takes the enlightened approach
By turning this situation over on its flipside
But dem Irates are pushing her into a state of ratchetossity
Another way to look at it could be that their jibes
Is a test of her spiritual mettle
And Hardliner aint made a B in a long ass time
God knows she don’t even know what an A looks like
Sista gurl scans her environs with a certain heaviness on her heart
She has had at least one or two good days here and there
When Oya’s winds are all soft and gentle
Like a sweet passing sea breeze
And the sky is an eye popping blue
With the sun just screaming ebulliently – WHAZZ UP!!!
If only she can just hold on to those widely scattered days
And make them a steady stream of goodness
That constantly irrigates her dome
Hardliner resigns herself to the choice to be better
Than the rachetossity trying to claim her soul
It is not like she has not tried to embrace that limitless life

And what is a limitless life Boo
How would you define it?

Hardliner realises that she has associated
Only joy and comfort with living a limitless life
Only blue skies with the sun scatting jazz
To keep the clouds away
She associates a limitless life with only goodness
No bad thing can happen when your bounty hits home

So then you associate living a limitless life with
That Disney magic- dreams come true stuff

Oh – like yall don’t gats to put it that way
Hardliner winces from the bright glare of this misconception
O.K. maybe she envisioned living that limitless life
Carefree of worry – just doing …
Well – doing…

Umph humph – they simply reply
Which conveys a world of meaning
As Hardliner comes full circle with this epiphany

Shit – she never thought of it in this light
Lawd-have-mercy – what’s next?
Hardliner sinks to the ground
Yeh this breakthrough gon be birthed on her butt

O.K we will take this in baby steps
From where you are at present – which is at ground level
Take comfort that there is no lower
When you are inside the ground – it’s over

How prosaic Hardliner mutters sardonically

Aint no faking this one baby
What words can you use to describe a life without limit?

Freedom – passion – joy – optimism

Let’s start with freedom
How do you interpret freedom and how does it feel Boo
Could it be that it resonates as escapism from the
Life you have dedicated your tale of woe to –
The place where you live out your magical Disney dreams come true
And let’s say you find this space – one of freedom – without limit
What next?
You put so much emphasis on the word limitless
Without giving thought to how you are to live your life
Totally ignoring the limitations that restrict you from coming
Into the fullness of the life that God has planned for you
Have you even given thought those limitations you place on yourself?
The limitations that encage you
When you should be soaring boundless skies?

Hardliner is nonplussed

We take that as a no

She sits there on her dry ground
Not quite parched – but sure as heyul getting there
What the hell is she gon do now?

Take in this moment Boo
You have all the time in the world
When you are ready – stand
Can nobody live a limitless life sitting down in defeat

I am catching my bearings
Sista gurl goes on the defence

Hardliner – life can dump you unceremoniously on your ass
It can make you prostrate before your inner alter
But the objective is to rise up from that ground level
Take your time – but you will stand
Cause you are made of more than just flesh and bones

The point where Hardliner always veers off track
Is envisioning the outcome without thinking about
The process that will get her to that magical outcome
And since she is a control freak and likes to know
That things are unfolding in the manner she has planned
The process of the unfolding always goes awry
Throwing curve balls at her – daring her to trust in God’s
Preordained plan for her life
And the worst part if this breakthrough is discovering
That she is a ride or die Disney Chick
That alone could keep her on her ass for a long time
That dreams come true Disney magic is wonderful
When a person can identify their dayum dreams
When they are fully aware that there will be times
When the dream pisses and frustrates the hell outta them
Cause to get to their dreams they gats to bleed
There is no dream fulfilment without the pain of failure
Without bad days – broke ass days and woe is me days
Hardliner gets it that there is no escape route from life
If it is to be lived limitless
Living without limit is pushing personal boundaries of comfort
It means pee gats to run down her leg out of fear
When inner growth takes her to places within
That are totally foreign – sometimes raw and painful
It means knowing that her skies will asunder
More than every now and again –
It means believing that she can do anything though
The God who made her
It means acknowledging and casting out the limitations
She has placed on herself to keep her encaged
And Hardliner knows that this in itself will be the truest
Test of her spiritual mettle

Freedom in itself is a beautiful word
It evokes the feeling of inner peace that comes
With being stripped of every and anything that
Burdens or limits or impedes mobility
And the most sweetest kind of freedom is being able
To live your life completely open – authentically expressing
The fullness of your spirit in every moment-
In every space you inhabit
And once you believe that you are without limit
Freedom becomes the world you inhabit

How does she believe that she is limitless
If she cannot feel it as yet

You fake it until you make it Boo
Even when you do not believe in your gut that you are limitless
But more like spineless – fake it – front that fearless mien
Even when your insides tremble with trying to get the belief
To take root inside your soul
When you keep reaffirming to yourself that you are limitless
You will start to believe it
But be warned – when you start telling yourself
That you are without limit –
Your limitations will be bold and bad enough to stare you down
To make you doubt yourself
And as you start to defy them by going against all the lies
They feed you about yourself – like not being enough
Strong enough – brave enough – worthy enough
You will rid yourself of your limitations one by one

Fake it until you make it – Hardliner muses
Well it is new day for a new way
One thing that resonates with Hardliner is that
Living a limitless life is not dependent on financial comfort
She can still be limitless in a job that frustrates her
With a bank account that has flat lined
In less than perfect relationships
It is a state of mind – a state of being
With these newfound pearls of wisdom
Sista gurl rises from the ground
She looks to the sky – the sun is scatting somethin’ fierce
Aint a cloud to be seen
With a half smile Hardliner acknowledges that
There is no other way to go – but up!

Selah

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s