“Gurl you know this means war
Dem people just can’t do you like that
You are more than this peanut promotion
You are operating at a level that is not reflected
By the coin you earn – that shit aint right
Bunch of petty- puffed up – hateful
Manipulative – summabitches!”

Ms. Ego is salty and she is letting it rip
Her sulphuric fury is stanking up Hardliner’s dome
Sista knows better than to court an insurrection of Ms. Ego
But right now – her little bitch fit swaddles
Like a warm and comfy Alpaca wool blanket

“And you betta know you aint giving jack shit
More than the salted peanuts you are being paid
Cause dem people are already using you like Kunta Kinte
Bitch ass mutha fuckers”

Ooooooooooooh that Andean Alpaca is the stuff right there
Hardliner is so Zenned out on comfort that she has obligingly
Left the gate open for Ms. Ratchet to sport her off-coloured vocabulary
Hell – don’t judge her
She is entitled to this here righteous anger
Cause that rich harvest she was promised
You know – the one that she did the James Brown victory shuffle for
At the beginning of 2015 came up scruffy as ratchet weave
Dang – what does a sista gats to do to get more coin?

Are you a number little one?
What number equates your worth?

Umph – Hardliner closes her eyes and counts emphatically to ten
In a bid to hold on to her Alpaca experience
Because she can feel the energy of spirit moving
Through her like rush of clean – crispy air
Dissipating the stank of Ms. Ego and her sidekick – Ms. Ratchet
In a ruthless expulsion from Planet Hardliner
Now gurlfriend feels bereft
Yall aint playing fair – she accuses plaintively
She on this here Yellow Brick Road – at a three pronged junction
In the same damn spot for ages
Unable to make up her mind as to which route to take
Just give her simple pisstossity –
Give her something righteous to work with

And then what little one
Will you be able to move on with clarity?
Will it bring you inner peace and reconciliation?
What is it that you want Hardliner?

One – two – three – four – five…

Nadie waits and watches as always
Knowing that eventually Hardliner’s latest
Drama infused crisis will implode like a cake
Against her better judgement
Hardliner slides a glance at Silver Shadow
And feels her resolve wilting instantly
That wolf gon be the death of her

But death has two faces – one of which is life
What you see as death is rebirth

How prosaic – she can’t help the sarcasm
But that ruthless take down of her Ego rankles Hardliner
Because it is like her indignation and hurt means nothin’

Is this all you see in this situation little one
Indignation and hurt
When you are in the midst of a chaos
Is that all you look at – the chaos
You are a seeker Hardliner
Why do you not seek the MORE in this situation?

Ok – she will own it
This peanut promotion – bruised her Ego
However is was more than simple disrespect
Which makes her consider Nadie’s question
Does she equate her worth with her salary?
Does she have a magic number?
That caters to validation – respect – and worth
Yea – Ms. Ego was rankled by those extra salted peanuts
But really Hardliner knows that at this particular junction in her life
She does not have anything to prove to nobody
What is the MORE in this situation – she asks herself
What other perspectives can be derived from
Her recent peanut promotion
Because Hardliner realises that a different perspective
Taken on any situation – particularly those that are hard to swallow
Can change her perception of the situation
Thus directing an new way forward in handling the situation

“Dang – gurl you are good
You can swallow blatant disrespect like it is cheesecake
What – your inner slave wants her freedom papers back?”

Hardliner takes a few deep – deeeeeeeeep – deep breaths
She is in bloody battle with her Ego – which is fighting like a beast
She senses Silver Shadow’s presence moving through dome
Sharpening her intuition – heightening her instincts

Untie yourself little one
The thought comes to her – as clear as daylight
Hardliner aint gats time to freak out that a wolf
Is communicating to her at the moment
With her Ego slaying and sward in hand and all

Untie yourself to this situation
Do you need this anger to survive?
Do not you believe in a new dawn?
Why do you believe more in this wounding
Than in your ability to survive it?
His questions are shrouded in genuine bafflement

Ooooooh Lawd
Sista is on her knees
Hands up and stretched out to the Great I am
Why does she believe more in this wounding
Than in her ability to survive it
But also to thrive in spite of it?
Sista needs to take a hallelujah praise moment
For this epiphany
In looking at this situation in a new light
Hardliner realises that this latest disappointment
Has sent her to faith boot camp
Yes sar – she is sweat out and palpitating
On self-belief and self-faith building exercises

Do not you believe in a new dawn?
In other words her canine guide is asking
Where is her self-belief and faith
In her instincts and intuition?
Why should she fearful of being hindered by persons
When her purpose has been laid out by God
If God is in her as she is in him
To have faith in God is to have faith in herself
Her instincts
Her talents
Her abilities
Her gifts
She could never be the highest and best expression of herself
If she lacks faith and belief in herself

Sista gurl fondly remembers a retort
Delivered by her laser tongued Irates
“Shit happens to test misdemeanour divas like you”
Well this peanut promotion did its job perfectly

Hardliner rises from her position of supplication
A little bruised but wiser
Sombre but light of heart
A little tired – but determined
Never to believe in a wounding more than
In her ability to survive it – and more so
To thrive in spite of it

Now Gurl where you at – she ponders
Looking out into the distance at a psychedelic sunset
Her instincts tell her – it’s time to move
The intro of Jimi Hendrix’s ‘little wing’ hits her dome
Just as sista veers to the left
She is on the yellow brick again
Treading virgin territory
If anything – Jimi will keep thangs interesting
For at least a while